Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Need your thinking caps on!!

Ok I got spring bug fever when I got my new bedding for my bedroom and I am soooooo impatient with this winter. I want to decorate. Now I can not paint or wallpaper this house (stupid idiots) but there has to be something I can do to change the look of my living room dining room combination. HELP!! Any one have any ideas? I am open to all and any suggestions except for the one that will says that my family portrait has to get down from the fireplace.. that is never going to go over well with my psche.. anything else you got??? I am ready to get this show on the road~

Tuesday, February 27, 2007


I forgot to add the pictures... and I don't know how to add them to a post already done...

Shopping versus cleaning

So I am standing in the shower this morning reaching for a towel off the rack when all I felt was blank air. I look up and notice no clean towels.. groan... I really need to fire this maid... so I grabbed the towel that Keith used last night (thank goodness he had hung it up properly). Then as I am standing in front of the mirror doing my hair I notice a wide swatch of white all around my forehead.. now I have been known to leave conditioner in my hair cause I forget to rinse so I look closer in the mirror and lo and behold it is WHITE hair!!!!!!!!!! A wide swatch of white hair!!! Where the heck did that come from???

So first no towels... then this white hair then I go in the bedroom to put the towels in the hamper and I see this big stack of laundry sitting there... ughhhh I did the only sane thing I could think of.. I went shopping. Now I had no list of things to buy.. well actually other then something to cover this grey and some things Lareta needed and I had to go to the produce market, I just wanted to get out of the house. By the way Lareta it is no fun whatsover shopping without you.

I am in the bedding department and see this sign for bed in a bag for $79.00!!!! I think ok obviously that is crappy stuff and horrid colors etc but I wander over and there right before my very eyes is the absolutely most perfect shade of blue! If I was a crayon I would be that blue. I would have bought it just for the sheets it was so perfect blue but there is more! I got a reversible comforter, not one but TWO complete sets of sheets, one set solid and one set striped including pillowcases, 2 sets of shams and 4 ornamental pillows! So I think nah.. that can't be right.. someone must have thought these were on sale found out they weren't and just stuck them on that shelf but I took them to the scanner and sure as shooting they were 79.00!!!

Well what could I do? I had to put them in the cart! Then I go around the corner into the next aisle and there are these beautiful white embroidered sheet set of 450 thread count with 17" pockets!! For 29.00!!! Was it my birthday and no one told me today??? So in the cart they went! Add to it a push up bra in MY SIZE that actually fit!! and I was a very happy girl!

Now I am home and realized that I forgot to go to the produce market and I forgot to get stuff for my hair but I am going to sleep like a baby tonight in my new bedding :=)

Saturday, February 24, 2007

Hockey Night in Canada

Last night Keith and I went to a hockey game with friends. They had gotten us some tickets last week and we didn't want to waste them even though I really wasn't up emotionally or physically to going. I decided part way through the game that when I become President of the World Hockey Association the first things I was going to do was change the following three things:

1. Make all pucks a fluorescent fuschia color so that one can follow the puck more easily. I am a sports fan but watching hockey on tv where the camera is focused on the puck is easier then at the actual stadium where you have to follow it yourself but you are too busy watching everything else going on around you.

2. All alcohol will be banned. There is nothing more nauseating when you are trying to watch a game and some idiot is breathing beer breath over your shoulder as he yells at the players

3. I understand that at times collision between 2 players that are skating at top speeds will happen and that it is an accident but when someone deliberately shoulder checks someone into the boards they would get an automatic 10 minute misconduct. If they did it a second time they would not only be off the ice but they would be banished to the dressing room for the remainder of the game.

At the very beginning of the game literally 2 seconds into the start, the referee had barely dropped the first puck onto the ice when a player from the visiting team just punches the face of another player. It took 4 minutes of fighting before the referee's stepped in!!! What is the point of having referees if they are going to stand there picking their noses?? Off with their heads I say!!!

But the highlight of the game was watching the little Timbits players come out to play during the intermission. They were so very cute some of them had sticks bigger then they were hehehehe. We also had seats in Row 1!!!! Just to the left of the net so needless to say I had the sensation of whiplash many times during the game from jerking back when the players literally ran into our faces... well at least to us women it seemed like they were landing in our laps! They were so close you could count their nose hairs!

But I did manage to catch a flying puck!!!! I caught one at the last game I was at too :) You snooze you lose Keith :)

Friday, February 23, 2007

Just because

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

12 1/3rd

We would like to announce that we are going to be granparents at least once this year. Our daughter Lareta and son in law Curt. He and their only son (with 4 sisters) are praying for a little boy. Darien just wants a brother and Curt wants the testosterone levels to raise up and scream dominance with the bathroom he can never find with all the females in there!!

Wait oh wait Curt... puberty is waiting around the corner for you!!!! lol

Missing you

I have had a difficult emotional last few days. It makes 5 years this week that my only sister died of cancer and I still miss her terribly. We were only 2 years apart in age. I guess part of it was because it made me think of the grandchildren she would never get to know. I thought about her when we found out we were going to be grandparents again this fall. I wanted to tell her and then I realized I couldn't. I know in my head that one day I will see her again but it doesn't help my heart any right now.
This was taken a couple of years before she was diagnoses with cancer. She was like me in a lot of ways. She loved anything outdoors especially riding horses and fishing. She is the one on the right and this is her daughter Robin with her.

Adele is on the right hand side with Robin again. This was just before she got sick.

This was taken at her last Christmas a couple of months before she died. She had already lost a lot of weight. This is my last picture I have of her.

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

What was I thinking???

So here it is almost 4:30am and I can't sleep. I did too much today with the moving stuff around and all the bending to put things away and pick up off the floor plus 5 loads of laundry. I really need to find a new maid. This one keeps taking days off! So as I was sitting up pacing the floor I decided I would go through one of the large boxes of pictures to sort them into the photo boxes. Actually I thought I would go through all of them but it took me 3 hours just to do one!! I had to go over the memories of each one and remember what was going on in the picture. I also came to the realization I take wayyyyyy too many pictures of our grandchildren!!

But what I did come across was 3 sets of 2 pictures that I want to share. The first set is of me at my very heaviest weight 3 years ago when I started my weight loss movement and of me at my lightest as an adult(Dancing with my dad). I weight 120-125 pounds in that one and thinking back to that particular day (my parents 25th ann) I remember thinking in my peon brain that I looked very stylish!!! Now seeing this same picture I have to think what kind of drugs was I on to think I looked so chic??? lol
Youth !! What can I say? I was 21 years old!
The second set of pictures was about 11 years ago at the Happiest Place on Earth! Yup you guessed it! Disneyland :)
The last set of pictures is of my mom, Lareta Senthia my grandmothers and myself in 5 generation pictures.My mom is in the white top/jacket in both pics and the one wearing the red shirt was my dad's mom with my mom's mom in the floral print. What I want to know was why did no one tell me what I looked like BEFORE these pictures were taken?? HELLLLO!!

I will never get to sleep now thinking I actually went out in public like that! Oh the shame of it all!

Monday, February 19, 2007

YEA!! I am organized!

In November I had Keith (after many numerous requests) switch rooms between my work space and the spare bedroom. I tried getting it together but then it was Christmas then had my training with work etc etc and just never seemed to find the time. But this afternoon I got everything put away and can now put my hands on what I need. The only bad thing that happened during this process was I had gotten some (sealed I might add) "kit" of potpourri, magazine rack, scented closet hangers etc etc that I wanted to put in here to make it special. Five minutes after just opening the package I developed a huge migraine and had to seal it all up and put it out on the back patio!! When I had scratched and sniffed the little decal at the store (it was honeysuckle and plum) I fell in love with the scent. I am not the kind of person that likes smelly houses of fruit and trees and rose gardens. I like my home to smell clean and fresh. It never occurred to me that a 100 people may have scratched that exact same decal before me and so doing so had minimized the fragrance. Oh well hey Lareta??? Want it ?? :) So here are some pictures of my completed room. I no longer have to clear my desk every time I change projects from computer to sewing to scrap booking to anything. I have 4 clear definite work areas. Now if I can only figure out how to clear out the lingering honeysuckle out of here I might be able to stay in here longer then 5 minutes lol

This cabinet Keith built for me about a year or so ago. The top left doors hold my fabric and top right fax paper, envelopes etc. Shelf is my sewing area and the shelf actually pulls out 2.5 feet which is the dept of the cabinet. just under this shelf that moves is a space that I put my large poster board etc. Don't ask why I have a tobaggan beside it :)

The first desk is my writing space where I do my family history and work on lessons that I have to teach etc. The boxes on top hold my magazines and how to manuals. Each one is labeled so I know at a glance where something is

This obviously is my computer desk where Snuggles the boss keeps a parental eye on me to make sure I don't go on any sites I shouldn't be on!

This is my scrap booking work station. It also is where I work on or will be working on my pictures and photo albums. You will notice under the desks are file boxes. These are FILLED with photos that need to be organized. On top of the top shelf are some empty photo boxes that I got for Christmas from Keith and now I can sort through the big boxes into some semblance of order.

This is the final area and this holds my scrap booking, craft and sewing supplies. The wicker cabinet bottom area is filled with paper of every kind for albums. Also holds all my cardstock.

So that's my organized area.. Now what should I build today? :)

Sunday, February 18, 2007

Dream Home

I have had this dream binder for as long as I have been an adult. Anytime I go somewhere whether to someone's home or at a store to window shop and I see something I file the idea/pictures/thoughts in my dream binder. Of course in my dream binder I have unlimited money hehehe. So I thought I would share with you what my idea of my dream home would be :)

This is the outside and the bottom floor or the grand floor as it is called.

These are the east and west wings that just out in the front of the building on both sides.

This is the second floor grand floor without the wings on the east and west sides :)

This is the second floor that is including entertainment rooms, media rooms, offices and suites as well.

You have to follow the first and second floor staircases to know where each part of these second floor areas goes over the first floor.

These are the wings for first and second east and west wings

And these are the turrets that will go up to the Princesses towers. After all we have 8 granddaughters that think they are Princesses and how could we as their mere beck and callers build a house without their towers!!

Family History Fair flyer

So I spent literally hours working on the flyer/invitation to this Family History Fair that I am doing next month and I show it to Keith this morning. He just kind of flips both sides and says "It's a little big isn't it? Can't you cut it down as in a regular invitation? Uh No! If you wanted things to look the same thing as same old same old you shouldn't have asked me to do it. Now I have to figure out how to post it on here so all of you can see it lol.. I have done it before but as most things in my head it has since disappeared.

This is the back of the flyer:

Saturday, February 17, 2007

Letter to Family and Friends

Hello Family, Friends, and Anyone Wishing to Know Me,

Allow me to begin by thanking you for taking the time out of your day to spend some time with me and get to know me better. A person’s time is their most valuable asset and yours is appreciated.

I want to talk to you about Fibromyalgia (FM) and Chronic Myofascial Pain Syndrome (MPS). Many have never heard of these conditions and for those who have, many are misinformed. And because of this judgments are made that may not be correct… So I ask you to keep an open mind as I try to explain who I am and how FM/MPS has assaulted not only my life but those whom I love as well.

You see, I suffer from a disease that you cannot see; a disease that there is no cure for and that keeps the medical community baffled at how to treat and battle this demon, who’s attacks are relentless. My pain works silently, stealing my joy and replacing it with tears. On the outside we look alike you and I; you wont see my scars as you would a person who, say, had suffered a car accident. You wont see my pain in the way you would a person undergoing chemo for cancer; however, my pain is just as real and just as debilitating. And in many ways my pain may be more destructive because people can’t see it and do not understand....

Please don’t get angry at my seemingly lack of interest in doing things; I punish myself enough I assure you. My tears are shed many times when no one is around. My embarrassment is covered by a joke or laughter, but inside I want to die....

Most of my "friends" are gone; I have been accused of "playing games" for another’s sympathy. I have been called unreliable because I am forced to cancel plans I made at the last minute because the burning and pain in my legs or arms is so intense I cannot put my clothes on and I am left in my tears as I miss out on yet another activity I used to love and once participated in with enthusiasm.

I feel like a child at times... Just the other day I put the sour cream I bought at the store in the pantry, on the shelf, instead of in the refrigerator; by the time I noticed it, it had spoiled. When I talk to people, many times I lose my train of thought in mid sentence or forget the simplest word needed to explain or describe something. Please try to understand how it feels to have another go behind me in my home to make sure the stove is off after I cook an occasional meal. Please try to understand how it feels to “lose” the laundry, only to find it in the stove instead of the dryer. As I try to maintain my dignity the Demon assaults me at every turn. Please try to understand….

Sleep, when I do get some, is restless and I wake often because of the pain the sheets have on my legs or because I twitch uncontrollably. I walk through many of my days in a daze with the Fibro-fog laughing at me as I stumble and grasp for clarity.

And just because I can do a thing one day, that doesn’t mean I will be able to do the same thing the next day or next week. I may be able to take that walk after dinner on a warm July evening; the next day or even the in the next hour I may not be able to walk to the fridge to get a cold drink because my muscles have begun to cramp and lock up or spasm uncontrollably. And there are those who say “but you did that yesterday!” “What is your problem today?” The hurt I experience at those words scars me so deeply that I have let my family down again; and still they don’t understand….

On a brighter side I want you to know that I still have my sense of humor. If you take the time to spend with me you will see that. I love to tell that joke to make another’s face light up and smile at my wit. I love my kids and grandbabies and shine when they give me my hugs or ask me to fix their favorite toy. I am fun to be with if you will spend the time with me on my own playing field; is this too much to ask? I love you and want nothing more than to be a part of your life. And I have found that I can be a strong friend in many ways. Do you have a dream? I am your friend, your supporter and many times I will be the one to do the research for your latest project; many times I will be your biggest fan and the world will know how proud I am at your accomplishments and how honored I am to have you in my life.

Please understand that being sick doesn't mean I'm not still a human being. There are days where I have to spend most of my day flat on my back in bed and I might not seem like great company, but I'm still me stuck inside this body. I still worry about school and work and my family and friends, and most of the time I'd still like to hear you talk about yours too.

Please understand the difference between "happy" and "healthy". When you've got the flu you probably feel miserable with it, but I've been sick for years. I can't be miserable all the time, in fact I work hard at not being miserable. So if you're talking to me and I sound happy, it means I'm happy. That's all. I may be tired. I may be in pain. I may be sicker that ever. Please, don't say, "Oh, you're sounding better!". I am not sounding better, I am sounding happy. If you want to comment on that, you're welcome.

Please understand that being able to stand up for five minutes, doesn't necessarily mean that I can stand up for ten minutes, or an hour. It's quite likely that doing that five minutes has exhausted my resources and I'll need to recover - imagine an athlete after a race. They couldn't repeat that feat right away either. With a lot of diseases you're either paralyzed or you can move. With this one it gets more confusing.

Please repeat the above paragraph substituting, "sitting up", "walking", "thinking", "being sociable" and so on ... it applies to everything. That's what a fatigue-based illness does to you.

Please understand that chronic illnesses are variable. It's quite possible (for me, it's common) that one day I am able to walk to the park and back, while the next day I'll have trouble getting to the kitchen. Please don't attack me when I'm ill by saying, "But you did it before!". If you want me to do something, ask if I can and I'll tell you. In a similar vein, I may need to cancel an invitation at the last minute, if this happens please don't take it personally.

Please understand that "getting out and doing things" does not make me feel better, and can often make me seriously worse. FM/CFS may cause secondary depression (wouldn't you get depressed if you were stuck in bed for years on end!?) but it is not caused by depression. Telling me that I need some fresh air and exercise is not appreciated and not correct - if I could do it, I would.

Please understand that if I say I have to sit down/lie down/take these pills now, that I do have to do it right now - it can't be put off or forgotten just because I'm doing something. FM/CFS does not forgive.

Please understand that I can't spend all of my energy trying to get well. With a short-term illness like the flu, you can afford to put life on hold for a week or two while you get well. But part of having a chronic illness is coming to the realization that you have to spend some energy on having a life now. This doesn't mean I'm not trying to get better. It doesn't mean I've given up. It's just how life is when you're dealing with a chronic illness.

If you want to suggest a cure to me, please don't. It's not because I don't appreciate the thought, and it's not because I don't want to get well. It's because I have had almost every single one of my friends suggest one at one point or another. At first I tried them all, but then I realized that I was using up so much energy trying things that I was making myself sicker, not better. If there was something that cured, or even helped, all people with FM/CFS then we'd know about it. This is not a drug-company conspiracy, there is worldwide networking (both on and off the Internet) between people with FM/CFS, if something worked we would KNOW.

If after reading that, you still want to suggest a cure, then do it, preferably in writing, but don't expect me to rush out and try it. If I haven't had it suggested before, I'll take what you said and discuss it with my doctor. She's open to new suggestions and is a great woman, and she takes what I say seriously.

Please understand that getting better from an illness like this can be very slow. People with CFS have so many systems in their bodies out of equilibrium, and functioning wrongly, that it may take a long time to sort everything out.

So you see, you and I are not that much different. I too have hopes, dreams, goals… and this demon…. Do you have an unseen demon that assaults you and no one else can see? Have you had to fight a fight that crushes you and brings you to your knees? I will be by your side, win or lose, I promise you that; I will be there in ways that I can. I will give all I can as I can, I promise you that. But I have to do this thing my way. Please understand that I am in such a fight myself and I know that I have little hope of a cure or effective treatments, at least right now. Please understand….

Thank you for spending your time with me today. I hope we can work through this thing, you and I. Please understand that I am just like you… Please understand….

Gone for now

Well life as I knew it is gone :( Keith has finished his contract in Surrey and has now added his Jeep to the hour long commute through rush hour traffic to his new contract downtown Vancouver where there is no transit near him and a total of 6 parking spots for the whole crew but as the site is next door to a new Tim Horton's being built all those cars are going over to Keith's site.

Now I am back to walking and or taking transit. Going to my doctor's in New West now is a nightmare. They are building condos or as our one son calls them, medium and high density developments under what used to be Sapperton Station. Well the Station is still there but there no longer is an elevator nor escalator. Only 5 flights of stairs. Which is ok going down but going back up is not a pleasant journey. There is one bus that gets off at Columbia Station and I can get that to my doctors but it only runs once an hour so that is as useful as a 2 watt bulb in a power outage.

For last 7 months that Keith has been in Surrey I have loved every blessed moment. I have had the Jeep to go wherever my heart wanted to. Even if I didn't get up to take Keith to work I could walk the ten minutes to his job site to pick it up. No more coming home for lunches. This really sucks.

I neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeed my own car!!!!!!!!! Keith tried telling me that no I did not need my own car I might WANT one but I did not need one. I said no that is not how it works. I WANT the car so bad I must need it! Female logic at its best!!

Catch up from hell

So much for my daily musings. I have just spent a week out of hell. Well figureatively speaking as I have never been to hell but if I had I would imagine it would match last week pretty close. Usually I have to contend with either my FM or with my spine very rarely do I have to deal with both at the same time. Except for this week. I don't know what set everything off but it did. What I have to do for relief for one area is contradictory for the other. For example I have to use ice to relieve the inflammation around my spine but cold sets the FM in a flareup. I have to use heat when my muscles contract but heat sets off the inflammation around my spine. Get the picture?

As if that wasn't enough, I woke up Wednesday night at 3 am reaching madly for the garbage can by the bed! Poor Keith... I don't think he has had a solid 2 hours sleep in a row any of the last few nights between holding my head from my throne, to changing ice packs on my tail bone to massaging my legs from the charlie horses.

I have missed my mammogram appointment this week as well as a shift at the family history centre, a dance at the church and a date night with hubby for Valentine's Day. I have stayed away from mirrors this morning as I can only imagine what I look like and what my hair is doing. But things could be worse. Our best friend suffered a major heart attack earlier this week. He has 3 arteries blocked 100%. They have done an angioplasty to open the 4th artery and he is in CICU. He is only 55 years old. We used to joke around all the time saying Keith had to relax before he had a heart attack as Keith is a "in your face very loud" kind of guy and our friend is a very laid back nothing fazes him kind of man. Goes to show how wrong you can be.

I am still determined to come up with something positive about my illnesses and today it is that I know one can not die from FM or degenerative disc disease. You might think you are in the middle of the night but you really are not. That is my story and I am sticking to it!!

Thursday, February 08, 2007

Day 2and 3

Well Day 2 I never posted as my mother taught me that if I can't say anything nice not to say anything at all so I stayed away from my computer. Rough day. I hate this weather. I really really do. Vitamin D is really on short supply in my system because of the FM and it causes my muscles to contract because I don't get natural sun in the winter. So I have to take 2000mg of VD every day which is a large dose just to get by.

But onto Day 3... took Lareta and Miranda to Children's hospital today to be checked with an ultrasound and a visit with the pediatrician. Her fluid on her kidneys has all gone on her right one and there is just a very slight amount on her left one so the pediatrician gave her a clean bill of health and said she no longer had to go for checkups. GREAT NEWS!! We barely had time to get home when I had to dash over to the Family History Centre for my shift. It was so incredibly busy. I got to learn how to do a bunch of new things and after 3 hours of work I was sooooo ready to sit down. But my pedometer clocked in a 3.2 miles from this afternoon and although my tail bone was burning it was hurting so bad, the muscles were actually really doing well from the constant exersises and bending etc. So the positive thing is if I continue to move I hurt less.

Monday, February 05, 2007

New 21 day challenge

So as I was thinking yesterday of starting a new challenge for myself I thought of different things I could work on. We all know patience is not my strong suit and figured I had pushed my limit working on it last month or so I needed a break :) I couldn't come up with anything as I thought about it throughout the day till later in the evening when I was watching a tv movie. Keith was at the dining room table doing some assignment on his laptop when he looked at me and said Sally you just saw that movie a couple of months ago don't you remember? And it hit me!!

I know what my new challenge is going to be. This FM really grates me most days and really gets me down most other days so my challenge is going to be to come up with one positive thing that I am going through BECAUSE of the illness! Talk about a challenge! I looked at him and chuckled and Keith asked what was so funny. I said you know that is a bonus with the FM. You can watch the same show twice in a row and you won't remember you already did. I said during rerun season I can't get bored anymore cause they are all new shows to me hehehehe.

So that is my positive thing for today. My short term memory loss is a good thing during rerun season :-D

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Getting money for nothing spam

For the last few weeks I have been corresponding with a Maria something or other in regards to this 40 million dollars that she says is coming to me. When I first read it I thought people don't really fall for this do they? But I have been playing along with her trying to get more information from her so that I can send it to the frauds commission and it is hilarious at the ends she/he will go through to get me to agree to fly to Spain and open up a non resident bank account so that they can put money in there from the Russian government. Anybody with half a brain would have checked out this so called person from Russia that the money has come from and known that he is the head of the Russian mob! OH yes just who I want knocking on my door looking for money! The Russian mob...

Too funny! So now she is saying I don't actually have to go to Spain to open up the account that they can do it for me. And how exactly are you planning on doing this without my signature? Oh well we just need you to fax us all your bank information, your name phone number SIN number etc etc.. Oh yes I will jump right on that band wagon lol.

The people I feel for are the elderly who get caught in these scams because they really still do trust everyone and they don't have the access to search online for information on these scams. What throws me is don't these idiots ever check the internet either to see if they are being monitored? There are pages and pages of the 419 scams on there with the exact same letter that I received just with different names. DUH... You may get me to read my emails at 3 am cause I can't sleep but I am not that stupid to actually send you my information so that you can wipe me out of my last 2 cents in my bank account!